We all have that story, the one of where we were and what we were doing on the day of September 11th. Perhaps mine is less compelling because I was in Canada (French class, 8th grade). I am not entirely sure why I feel the need to validate or quantify whether my story is compelling or not, and in comparison to whose story I am not sure. Perhaps it’s the writer in me. Perhaps it’s the Canadian in me.
As a country, we are cast, always, in the shadow of our neighbour.
Last night I fell asleep to the thought of Nuclear Holocaust. It would not be the first time I have ever thought about it. I have thought about it every so often since September 11th, 2001. I thought about it more frequently after I learned which countries have nuclear weapons in my fourth year seminar class on the 1950s (I find the Cold War fascinating). And then, again, last night, after reading just a few headlines regarding the United States, essentially declaring war on Iran. History, as they say, repeats itself and Twitter would be remiss to ignore the correlation between Clinton’s postponed Impeachment hearing and Trump’s pending Impeachment hearing as a result of, you guessed it, bombing a country in the Middle East.
As a citizen of a country that shares a border, a history, an economy, and essentially an Army with the United States, I have to say, I do not care for this kind of reckless behaviour by my so-called brother (technically countries are female, but I refuse to give that kind of dignity to the current version of the USA). I don’t care for this kind of behaviour full stop, but it seems especially frightening when you’re politically stitched into the side of a country that is led by a histrionic psychopath, who is so clearly afflicted with dementia and a version of hubris that can only be described as a personality disorder. The man is the definition of unfit for office, and yet, here’s the US Military & government, allowing him to order the assassination of other world leaders from countries in possession of nuclear fucking bombs.
Here’s how it all happened in my head, as I lay down to rest for the night:
- Iran brutally attacks Iraq. Lots of people die. Including Americans.
- Iraq once again becomes a heightened battle ground.
- Russia laughs in Donald Trump’s hideous face for thinking they had any kind of friendship. Russia begins to clap back at the West in support of the Middle East. Putin makes whatever the Russian version of popcorn is.
- Iran threatens to bomb Israel and/or the United States. Both countries are PISSED.
- Nuclear interception becomes the hot topic of conversation. Canada gets dragged into this conversation.
- Donald Trump tries to blow Iran off the map. The Army LETS HIM.
- Nuclear War begins.
- We all die. It takes 3 weeks.
It’s a simply 8-step plan to total and complete annihilation. Forget the Australian Wildfires. Forget the millions of humans being displaced on a daily basis as a result of war, poverty, bigotry, and various attempts at genocide. Forget saving the motherfucking rainforest. None of that will matter when we turn this planet into a lump of radioactive coal, orbiting the Sun and ceasing to exist as we know it.
So buy, buy, buy up all you can in the few precious days or weeks that we have left living on this beautiful blue dot. Consumerism is, after all, our only true joy. Relish in your time here on Earth. If nothing else, this is a wonderful exercise in mindfulness, gratitude, and being truly in the moment. Let this be a moment of perspective. And before you go to bed, think about the role your country may or may not play in this worst case scenario of Cold War 2020. Just don’t expect it to help you sleep at night.
